I am speechless right now yet more knowledgeable of why people cut. I went to a camp in the Summer and one of the girls I was in charge of is a cutter. I saw it like a day before camp was over but I did not know what to say to her. I did not understand it. It was my first encounter with someone who cut themselves. You say you don’t see yourself ever stopping and that is the saddest statement you have made in your blog. I say that because you can be free from cutting and the darkness that you speak about.
Reactions from people are varied when they find out that I cut. From the, “Did it really get that bad? They’re not little cuts. Why do you cut? Why would you do that to yourself? Doesn’t it hurt? You’re just attention seeking.” All the way through to the begging, pleading you to stop. Getting angry at you for doing it again. And again. And again.
I’d put it down to several things. Curiosity. Fear. Love. Caring. Compassion. Lack of education, or experience, of mental illness. Ignorance.
I’ve wanted to write about cutting for a long time now. The way my head analyses the cutting, anyway. I’ve never been sure how to start.
I guess I start here. Did it really get that bad? Uh, yeah. It is probably still that bad. Apart from the obvious that you have to be pretty screwed up…
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