Recently, I was hurt badly by a friend. I felt a deep rejection by what the person said. Normally, I would tell that person a piece of my mind. I mean, how dare you tell me the truth about how my behaviour makes you feel. Get the picture? I listened to gospel music for the remainder of the night while I cried myself to sleep. I woke up the following morning still angry but instead of venturing into the valley of resentment, hatred and death. I went on my laptop and started listening to the scriptures as I surfed the web for articles of being healed from rejection.
The root of rejection
It is said that according to the theorist Erik Erickson Trust vs. Mistrust – Hope. During the first or second year of life, the major emphasis is on the mother and father’s nurturing ability and care for a child, especially in terms of visual contact and touch. The child will develop optimism, trust, confidence, and security if properly cared for and handled. If a child does not experience trust, he or she may develop insecurity, worthlessness, and general mistrust to the world. Therefore, such a child/children, you and I could have developed a sense of rejection due to what Erickson explained in his 8 stages of development.
Having a mistaken identity is also apart of the root of rejection. How so? Rejection attacks who we are and therefore, if we have a tarnished understanding of who we are or if we are uncertain of our identity then when rejection attacks, we have no defense against it.
Also, if we find our identity in our: profession, what persons say about us, or our academic success then we are totally in error of who we think we are. For instance, what if that profession is taken away? our friends starts to speak badly about us or our grades starts to drop and we are now said to be failing in school. How would that affect our image of ourselves/our identity? Would we now think that we are failures? Would we become lost, depressed or even suicidal?
Let us be totally honest with ourselves and start this journey of being freed from rejection.
I would like to hear what you think or if you feel brave enough to share your stories of dealing with rejection, please post your comments or like this blog.
– think on these things.